Grief – Z. Elizabeth

BOOK TOUR: Fall from Love – Heather London

Posted on June 25, 2013June 15, 2013 by Z. Elizabeth

Today is The Book Lover’s stop on the Fall From Love book tour. I will be sharing my review with you.

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Synopsis

Struggling to put her life back together after a tragic mountaineering accident kills her college sweetheart, twenty-one-year-old Holly Treadwell is trying to set aside her grief, forge ahead in school, and find herself again.

When Carter Hansen, a guy who brings back horrible memories from the night of the accident, finds his way back into her life, Holly’s unsure if she should let him in. He terrifies her in more ways than one and invokes feelings in her that she thought were buried forever. Regardless of her fears, she knows she must face him in order for her heart to heal.

Everyone tells Carter that what happened on the mountain that night was just a terrible accident, but even then, he can’t help but carry around the guilt and is unable to forgive himself. He’s drawn to Holly and being near her helps ease his conscience and gives him the release he needs.

As Holly and Carter’s relationship grows, they begin to realize that the more time they spend with one another, the more their wounds begin to heal—her grief and his guilt. But when Holly learns the details about the night of the accident—what everyone has been keeping from her—it will rip open old wounds and tear apart what they’ve both worked so hard to overcome…

4 /5 stars

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My Review

If Holly could rewind that night, she would have never let college sweetheart walk out the door. That night changed everything and since her boyfriend died after a tragic mountaineering accident, she is struggling to put her life back together. With the help of her best friend Jenna, she is trying to put her grief aside and get on with her life. But it’s just hard.

Carter Hansen was with Holly’s boyfriend the night of his death. He brings back horrible memories from that night but he finds a way back into Holly’s life. He just wants to know shes okay and he wants her to know the truth about that night too. Although she doesn’t want anything to dowith him, the more time they have to spend together, the more they become friends. He evokes felings in her she thought she’d never feel, but shes scared.

Carter has seen more death in his life than he should have and even though everyone tells him that night wasn’t his fault, he can’t help but feel guilt and he can’t forgive himself. He needs to forgive himself but he needs Holly to understand the truth of that night first.

What happens when their relationship grows, their wounds begin to heal but Holly finds out about that night? That everyone knew apart from her? Will it tear Holly and Carter apart?

When I saw Fall From Love was having a tour, I literally signed up that very moment. I had read the synopsis and had wanted to read the book asap. As soon as it was gifted to me, that was it. I HAD to read it. I was pulled in from the very first page and from then on, I was sucked in and had to get to the end, to know what was going to happen and see the journey that Holly (and Carter) take, along and together.

Ms. London has a way in which she captivates you within the fiction world. She wrote characters in which you care for. You feel for them, whether it’s to smack them across the head, cry for them, want to give advice or want to be their friend, I felt this way with Holly. Wanting to help her through everything she was feeling, wanting to get her to open her eyes, but then I felt the same with Carter too.

You really do go through the motions. You cry, laugh, swoon, want to beat them around the head, want to shout, throw your kindle down, have your own heart aching, but I love these emotions. It made the book and the pain of what Holly and Carter had been through real.

Carter – I loved him. I can’t reiterate how much I loved reading about him. He’s broken, having known so much about death in his 22 years. He has guilt pouring through him, he has pain pouring through him and since that night of Adam’s death, all hes wanted to do was protect Holly. His caring side showing through. Wanting to make sure she was okay, wanting to save her really from the grief that overtook.

Although consumed with pain, feelings shone through Carter. Feelings that he didn’t really understand but feelings that he welcomed, even if he couldn’t share them. He was a great character, he was funny and sweet and vulnerable too. You wanted to help take away the pain, be there for him, be his friend, be his girlfriend. Help him through the night of Adam’s death that he held onto so badly.

But he was a dipstick at times. He wanted Holly, he wanted her more than a friend but he was scared. Scared of losing her, of losing her if things didn’t work out and scared of telling her the truth. You just wanted to smack him across the head and tell him that Holly wanted him too and to just go for it. You could see the confliction go through him. He had lost so much and if he lost Holly too, it would kill him. The journey he takes, you see him forgive himself, fall in love and revert back to his old self, the person who is happy and loved up. It was a great sight to see.

I loved Holly and her journey. You see her retreating, and rightly so when her boyfriend Adam dies. You see the pain, the grief, the longing for him to be there with her. She just can’t get over the fact that one night he was there, and the next he was gone. Ripped from her. Her pain eats her up.

Her journey is a tough one. She takes it day by day. Some days are good, some are bad, but she proceeds to try and get over her grief with the help of her best friend Jenna and Carter. You see her become stronger day by day, fall in love with Carter, but shes petrified of her feelings. Her feelings for Carter and scared about losing him, as he is too.

There is such a strong connection between them, that they try to ignore it, but they both feel it. With the help of loved ones, she finally breaks down the barrier she has up, she lets go of her pain and the grief she holds onto and although she will always love Adam, she loves Carter. When a certain situation happens, you see just how much she loves him, going to him, waiting for him and showing him that he won’t lose her.

I loved watching her grow, loved watching her become herself again, finding herself, finding love and becoming the strong girl she used to be.

There love was a slow build up. From friends, to best friends, to lovers. It was great to see their relationship move slowly, getting to know one another, falling in love over time. Nothing was rushed, it was taken at a steady pace and even though there were so hiccups along the way, everything turns out fine in the end. Everything is sorted out and they finally succumb to their feelings, after shying away and hiding them for so long. Afraid to change what they had together.

My favourite scene includes Carter and Holly. It involves a night when Carter is mountain rescuing and Holly is freaking out. I’m not going to say anything else about what happens, but it’s a pivotal point between these two and one that changes their whole relationship. For the better or for worse? That is something that you need to read to find out yourself 😉

Jenna and Josh (Carters bff) are amazing secondary characters…okay they aren’t so secondary as they are literally a foursome, they all do everything together. They are so cute and funny together, you can see the love they have for one another and for their respecitive best friend. Jenna is awesome, she is always there for Holly, through thick and thin and she will do whatever she can to make sure Holly can get through Adam’s death and slowly convert back into the old Holly, the one who was full of life. She’s there to help her heal. Josh is the same with Carter. Carter and Josh have been best buds since they were little and have been through so much together. Both friends just want to see their friends happy….with each other as its obvious that Holly and Carter want one another. They say the best things to push them together and I loved Josh and Jenna, together, in their relationship and as friends to the two.

Fall From Love is an emotional journey. A journey of grief, friendship, love and overcoming your past to focus on your present and future. It truly was a great book to read, and I would recommend it to all you lovely people to grab your copy and become engrossed within the story of Carter and Holly. It’s definitely real and heart-clenching and a book that should be read by everyone.

New Adult, Romance

Falling Into You – Jasinda Wilder

Posted on March 22, 2013 by Z. Elizabeth

Synopsis

I wasn’t always in love with Colton Calloway; I was in love with his younger brother, Kyle, first. Kyle was my first one true love, my first in every way.
Then, one stormy August night, he died, and the person I was died with him.

Colton didn’t teach me how to live. He didn’t heal the pain. He didn’t make it okay. He taught me how to hurt, how to not be okay, and, eventually, how to let go.

5/5 stars

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My review

So you know how I always mention that if a book makes me cry then it’s a great one? Well I full on ugly cried throughout this book, so much so, I had to stop, redo my make-up so I could go to work.

Oh god, Jasinda Wilder completely drew me in with Falling Into You. It didn’t take me long at all to read it because I literally devoured it. I couldn’t get enough. Ms. Wilder had me beaming, then sobbing then feeling every single emotion both Nell and Colt were feeling. The songs, dear god, they set me off and because I was also listening to music on my Ipod, songs that were convenient to that scene appeared and I was a mess. But I did like feeling this way as I’ve said; books that make me sob are great ones.

Nell and Kyle grew up together. Since the moment they were born they have been inseparable and to everyone, it seemed inevitable that one day they would end up together. During one argument, their confusion for how they were looking at each other differently came to light and since that moment, they had been together. From best friends to lovers, it seemed an easy transaction for them both. And it was perfect. As a first love, Jasinda captured what it was all about. From the awkwardness of talking about sex, to the desire they had for one another.

But then, I was on edge, because of the synopsis. I was waiting in suspense of when the death of Kyle would happen. I didn’t like that feeling at all because I was dreading it. Dreading to find out how he would die. And oh god, I cried so much I had to put my kindle down and take a few minutes before I could continue. My heart broke for both Kyle and Nell.

I instantly loved Kyle. He was the best friend Nell ever had. He was always there for her, making her happy, comforting her when she was sad or upset and he was protective over her. They were both there for each other. When feelings changed for one another, it was inevitable. They grew up together, spent every day together; they knew everything about each other so it was just down to time as to when they would be together.

They were happy-go-lucky, in love with one another, waiting to take the next step all their friends were taking. Shift two years in to the future, and they were the happiest they could have been. Then one night it was all taken from Nell. Kyle was taken from her in the most terrible and perhaps heroic way. He saved her but Nell couldn’t see that. She saw her kill him.

When this scene occurred I, 1. Thanked my stars I wasn’t on the train to work, and 2. Cried my heart out until I just had to shut my kindle down and get some sleep. It was just heartbreaking watching Nell’s reactions and sobs and cries for Kyle, and it just hit my core, the amount of pain they were both feeling, all different types of pain consuming them.

Since that fatal day, Nell was never the same. She didn’t cry anymore, she held all the pain and guilt inside of her, still blamed herself for Kyle’s death and just pottered on in life, having nightmares of that night. She still held on to everything, wanting Kyle back. It choked me up over how she kept all the pain inside and wouldn’t let it out. Kyle was her best friend and boyfriend whom she loved and watching him die that way, I know I would never be the same again.

At the funeral we meet Colton – Kyle’s brother whom Nell has never met. There is this connection between them, they share pain over Kyle but it was more than that. But Nell runs and tries to ignore it. She has just lost Kyle.

When she saw Colton after two years, busking in Central Park, that spark is still there, but so is the pain, for both of them, but more so Nell. Colton can see that and is determined to help her through it. Not to tell her it will all be okay, because it won’t, but just get her to open up, get her to release all the pain and to cry. He sure as hell knows about pain, suffering through his childhood and then the pain he suffered in New York. But he’s dealing with it and tries to help Nell deal with it too.

I loved Colton. Sure he seemed like the tough guy and he was, but he was now reformed. Under all the exterior and the tattoos he was just has broken as Nell, but he found ways to get through it. He was caring, protective and music was his way of speaking. I adored all the music he wrote, they were all heartfelt and had me crying. He wasn’t perfect by any means but he really loved Nell and would do anything to help her through the pain, in turn, helping himself too. His advice and his own past experiences of pain and getting through it were enlightening and truthful. And as I’ve mentioned, they both went through horrific things but together, they were trying to make things okay and less painful.

I liked how things weren’t all rosy and cherries on top, they were both feeling the effects of losing loved ones but together, they made it bearable to live each day and to find love with one another. Even at the end of the book, they were still hurting but being together, falling into each other, they knew they were meant to be and they would always be there, to ease the pain somehow and down the line, maybe erase the pain and just leave the guilt and grief behind and turn it into great memories of lost loved ones.

The sex scenes. Oh heck. Seriously, you’ll be fanning yourself because the chemistry between the two of them is off the scale as is the sex. Colton certainly knows what he is doing and how to bring intense and explosive pleasure to Nell. There’s this overwhelming connection that they both share and it just made the sex between them even hotter. They both know what they want and how to please each other and I just…*sigh* would like a Colton for myself.

Music is a massive factor in this book. The music spoke the emotions that both Nell and Colton are going through. Each song represented what they were feeling, from pain, to love, there was a song for each chapter of their life. And it didn’t help that I was listening to my IPod when I was reading this book and songs relevant to the scenes would play, which in turn made me break down reading the scenes.

Falling Into You, is definitely a Five star book. I loved every second of this book. It’s emotional, but there are parts where I was laughing and smiling despite the theme of the book. You’ll want to hug all the characters, take their pain away too and connect with them, not just through the music but you’ll think about your own losses. Your heart will ache but it will get better, you’ll make it through the book, through Nell and Colton’s journey to try and be okay and in the end, you will be.

You all need to give Falling Into You a read, Jasinda Wilder wrote an AMAZING book!

Chelsea M. Cameron, New Adult

Deeper We Fall (Book #1) – Chelsea M. Cameron

Posted on January 27, 2013April 17, 2013 by Z. Elizabeth

Synopsis

Two years after her best friend was involved in a car accident that caused a traumatic brain injury, Lottie Anders is ready to start her freshman year of college. Ready to move on. Ready to start forgetting the night that ripped her life apart.

Her plans come to a screeching halt when not one, but both brothers responsible for the accident end up back in her life again.

Zack is cruel, selfish and constantly rubbing what happened to her friend in Lottie’s face.

Zan is different. He listens to her awkward ramblings. He loves “To Kill a Mockingbird” as much as she does, and his dark eyes are irresistible. His words are few and far between, but when he does speak, she can’t help but listen.

The trouble is, Zan was the driver in the accident, and now Lottie’s discovered he lied to her about what happened that night. Now she must decide if trusting him again will lead to real forgiveness, or deeper heartache.

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My Review

A night out two years changed everything in Lottie’s life. Her best friend Lexie sustained a brain injury and she’s never been the same. The driver Zan, although not drunk wasn’t old enough to drive, caused the injury when he swerved to avoid a deer and his brother Zack was also to blame when he practically forced Lexie to go with him. Lottie has so much hatred for the guys, but more so Zack than Zen.

Today, she and her twin brother Will are now beginning college but the thing is, Zack and Zen are at the same college and Lottie’s roommate Katie is dating Zack. This is definitely something she doesn’t need in her life. Zack is still the same arsehole he was two years ago but Zan is different. He’s nothing like Lottie pictured he would be in her mind and hating him is now proving more difficult the more time they spend together. She doesn’t want to feel anything for him but love concurs all.

Zan has been holding onto the guilt and grief of what happened for more than two years. He’s learnt the hard way for the past few years but he’s powered through it and with the help of his social worker Miss Carole, he’s now trying to at least get his life back on track. Before the accident, he was trying to build up the courage to talk to Lottie but that all went to pot. Now hearing she is at the same college, it’s kind of fucked him over. He knows she hates him, but he has liked her for so long and really wants the chance to say sorry and make it up to her somehow.

Everything he does is for her. He’s the silent type, one who thinks over what he is going to say first. Music is his escape along with running, reading and poetry and you really do go on a journey with him. He’s holding on to a big secret about that night and it’s tearing him up inside that when it finally comes out – to Lottie – he feels free for the first time in his life.

Lottie has also been holding onto the guilt of that fatal night, blaming herself for not dragging Lexie away from Zack. She’s hated the two brothers since that night and now knowing they both attend the same college, no less rooming in the same building, she just can’t catch a break. She will always hate Zack and she says she will always hate Zan, but the more they bump into each other and the more time they kind of spend time together, you can see she is falling for him, although she would much rather not.

She is such a caring best friend to Lexie, a great twin sister to Will and a great friend to every secondary character in the story. She’s a strong and resilient character but she feels weak when her feelings for Zan change from hate to love. She just couldn’t stop it, no matter how hard she wanted to, but really, giving in was the best thing she could have done because they were both so great together. They were there for each other through thick and thin.

The chemistry between Zan and Lottie always seems to pull them back together, no matter how many times Lottie tells him to stay away from her. But more time down the line, they become friends, although it’s obvious to both of them there is more between them. It did take Lottie a long time to admit that she wanted Zan, and then hid their relationship from everyone, even though everyone knew.

I loved it when they actually went public with it, because it proved that Lottie had forgiven Zan and her guilt for liking him was finally vanishing. I understood why she didn’t want to go public after telling everyone she hated him, but even her brother knew she was starting to like him and really, he was nothing like she pictured in her mind. He was kind, caring and loved her deeply that when there was a pivotal point in the book for the two of them, I cried, simply because Leona Lewis – I Got You came on and made it more intense to read!

Deeper We Fall really gets into you. It did for me. It got me thinking about if this happened to my best friend and I was the one in Lottie’s shoes. Would I react the same way she did every time she saw and bumped into Zan? Would I start to like him even if I didn’t want to? Would I forgive him for shattering my best friend’s life? It’s definitely hard to comprehend when it hasn’t happened to you, but it did go through my mind that I most probably would react the way Lottie had.

As I’ve said, it’s hard to completely know what you would do in this situation, and that’s exactly what Simon – Lottie and Will’s friend – asks her one night. Would she feel the same if it was Will who drove the truck and caused the accident? I ask you, those who have read this book, what would you do if you were in Lottie’s position? Especially when you would get to know Zan as more than the boy who caused your best friend’s life to change forever and more the boy who you were falling for.

I loved all the secondary characters, of course apart from Zack, but that was because he was an utter douchebag and really hadn’t seemed to change or actually give a shit about the fatal night. They all had their own personalities that shone in the book and I instantly took a liking to Trish, Will and Simon. They had me in giggles over what they would say. I loved the close-knit family they all had together especially in one part of the book when something terrible happens and they all get together to be there for that character and for each other.

Deeper We Fall truly is about forgiveness, second chances, letting go of your guilt, finding love and building a family of friends. It was a great read from Chelsea and completely different to My Favorite Mistake. She made each character distinguished from each other and the ending was just fun for both Lottie and Zan. It was how their relationship properly started and it was great that they could just be free of all the guilt that had eaten them up about the accident and about being together (more on Lottie’s part was the latter). They really were a perfect match for one another.

I shall definitely be recommending this book and I cannot wait for the second book, Faster We Burn, which is about Katie – Lottie’s roommate and Stryker- Zan’s college friend, which are characters in Deeper We Fall. Here’s to more Lottie and Zan in that book too!!

Romance

Heaven Can Wait – Cally Taylor

Posted on December 6, 2012December 6, 2012 by Z. Elizabeth

Synopsis

‘What would I do without you, Lucy Brown?’ he said, and kissed me softly. I held his face in my hands and kissed him back. I felt that life just couldn’t get any more perfect. And I was right, it wouldn’t. By the end of the next day, I’d be dead.

Lucy is about to marry the man of her dreams – kind, handsome, funny Dan – when she breaks her neck the night before their wedding. Unable to accept a lifetime’s separation from her soulmate, Lucy decides to become a ghost rather than go to heaven and be parted from Dan.

But it turns out things aren’t quite as easy as that. When Lucy discovers that Limbo is a grotty student-style house in North London she’s less than thrilled. Especially after meeting her new flatmates: grumpy, cider-swilling EMO-kid Claire; and Brian, a train-spotter with a Thomas the Tank Engine duvet and a big BO problem.

But Lucy has a more major problem on her hands – if she wants to become a ghost and be with Dan she has to complete an almost impossible task. How the hell does a girl like Lucy find a girlfriend for the dorkiest man in England? IT geek Archie’s only passions are multi-player computer games and his Grandma.

But Lucy only has twenty-one days to find him love. And when she discovers that her so-called friend Anna is determined to make a move on the heart-broken, vulnerable Dan, the pressure is really on..

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My Review

It’s the night before Lucy and Dan’s wedding, and with Dan leaving Lucy alone, she decides to climb up to the attic to retrieve her gift for Dan. Only problem is, she falls and breaks her neck.

Lucy Brown is now declared dead.

After waking up in Limbo, Lucy is given an ultimatum – She can go to Heaven for eternity and be with her parents, or return as a Ghost/living dead on Earth, and therefore be around Dan once more.

As she misses Dan a hell of a lot, she decides to return to Earth, but the thing is, she has to complete a mission before she can become a ghost and be around Dan forever. She only has 21 days to complete this mission – And the mission is to find computer geek Archibald Humphries-Symth his soulmate. Will Lucy manage to find his soulmate in such a short time and become a ghost or will she fail and end up in Heaven, in a life without Dan until he joins her?

I’m so very glad that I found this book. I love reading about soulmates and with the added ‘Death’ involved in this one, as well as everlasting love, I knew I had to download it and give it a read. I was not disappointed at all in it!

Throughout the 21 days, Lucy occurs friendships with her two ‘ghost’ housemates, which were so special to read. Although they started off roughly -especially with Emo girl Claire – in the end, before both Claire and Brian completed their 21 days, they all grew closer together and looked out for one another when things didn’t go completely their way, helping out when they could. You always got to know both their stories for ending up in Limbo, and why they were doing the mission as to who or what they wanted to stick around if they completed their task.

Lucy’s friendship with Archie – I loved it so much. Albeit, it was for a mission, but it seemed so real to me. She really wanted to help him find someone – it was her mission after all – but the things she does to facilitate her mission touched my heart. I actually thought Lucy and Archie would end up falling in love with one another, but I was sourly mistaken. It was really sad when they met up on her last day. You could tell she was really going to miss him and he was her too, although she had been a complete idiot the night before.

The thing with this book is that when I think something will happen, it takes a turn and surprises me when it doesn’t go that way. That’s what I loved about this book.

Throughout the book, you got to see snippets of Dan and Lucy’s life, and their love for each other was something you really want for yourself. They both had banter together, they both couldn’t live without the other and I really couldn’t see Dan getting with anyone after Lucy’s death, no matter how hard a certain someone tried. Ghost Lucy’s grief and despair really showed throughout the book and I felt so sad that all she wanted was to be with Dan again. Cally really engaged me and I felt all the emotions from all the characters in the book through all the different situations.

On her last day, when Bob from Limbo calls her, she makes a really tough decision about what to do. I really felt for her, because after everything she had done in the 21 days and the things she had seen, it would have been torture to choose what she did, BUT oh my gosh, that ending! I was not expecting that at all. That was one major plot twist. As I type this, tears are still falling down my cheeks but in a really good way. I loved how Cally kept me on my toes over what was going to happen in the end. It really could have gone either way, but I’m so very happy it ended how it did. Hence the tears!

If you want to read a book about loss, forever love and friendships, this book has to be on you book list. It made me laugh, cry, gasp and want a ‘happy’ – as you can be when you’re dead – ending and this book did not fail.