Tag: demons

Posted in Family, Music, Terri Anne Browning

The Rocker That Needs Me (#3) – Terri-Anne Browning

Posted on by Z. Elizabeth

17852261Synopsis

The Demon…

I’ve been fighting my own demons for most of my life. The alcohol seems to numb the pain, but it never makes the nightmares go away. All I want in life is a little peace. When I met my angel it felt like I found it, but there is so much standing between us. Why does she have to be so young…?

The Demon’s Angel…

Meeting Drake was the best thing to ever happen to me. I found my friend, my soul mate. But he lets my age stand between us. There is something that haunts him, and I selfishly want to be the one that helps him conquer his ghosts. If he would just let me in, let me closer, I think I could help him…

4.5 / 5 stars

My review of The Rocker That Holds Me HERE
My review of The Rocker That Savors Me HERE

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My Review

Since I had found the first book in The Rocker series by Terri Anne Browning, you could say I have fallen in love. In love with her and with the band. Since The Rocker That Holds Me, I have become obsessed with the stories. Of wanting to know the past of each character, to wanting ALL the books out now so I can gobble up each of the guys and the girls and watch their happy endings after all the shit they have been through.

If you have read my review of book two – The Rocker That Savors Me, you will see that I have such a massive soft spot for Drake. Okay, not a soft spot, I am basically in love with this guy. There is just something about him that drew me in. His dark past, his vulnerability, and the fact I want to mollycoddle him and be the one to help him through his past, through his drinking and just be the one for him. I know, I know, hes fictional, but I don’t care. In my head, he can be as real as I want him to be! Hahah.

You could say that my excitement for this book is an understatement. I was PISSING myself over getting my hands on this book so when Terri-Anne emailed me about an ARC, well who the hell was I to pass up reading The Rocker That Needs Me and my book boyfriend? OF COURSE I wanted an arc. I needed to learn all about Drake and his past and his relationship with Lana.

Myself and Holly (@Hollyshotreads) are completely besotted by this series and by Drake that we waited until each other had finished our respected books and read it together. We have been sooo anxious for the past few weeks and were completely excited to finally read Drake’s story. The texts she was sending me were making me chuckle!!

My darling Drake. My darling, darling drake. His prologue killed me. It killed me. And I cried. Yes, I cried at the start of this book. I knew it was going to be a bumpy and emotional ride, I knew it would be a hard and long journey and I knew we would find out about his awful past and the reason why he drink excessively until he blacks out. I was hoping that this wasn’t going to be his past, but I just cried so much when it turned out just what his past was.

It was heartbreaking and it really made you understand part of the reason he drank. I completely understood though, it just broke my heart that he needed the alcohol to numb him, to make the pain and the past go away. To stop him feeling guilty too.

But then he spots his angel when moving Layla and her sisters back to their guest house. But his angel is 17 years old and hes 31. He feels like hes found his soul mate but shes too young. He wants to stay away but he can’t. It’s like he needs Lana to breathe. To fill his life with some kind of hope, hope that he can get over his demons in time and hope that he can turn his life around and stop the drinking once and for all.

You really do see Drake change over the course of the book. Because of the dual POV, we got inside Drake’s head, which I absolutely loved. You got to see his fears, his insecurities, how he thought of himself and his band brothers and Emmie, and especially how he thought of Lana – his angel.

Of course there are parts where you just want to smack Drake but I loved how he needed and wanted to get help. Help for his drinking and for his past, no matter how hard it was for him to dredge it all back up. I felt like a proud momma for Drake sorting his shit out. He did it for Lana, for Shane, for himself.

Drake really does come a long way. He is a strong character, despite the addiction to alcohol. He is vulnerable too and completely besotted with Lana, which I found so heart clenchingly adorable.  You could really see the fear of losing her when something big happens, and that is what kicks him ass into gear to try and win her back, to be a better man for her. He never wants to be without her, ever.

Angel, or Lana, as her real name goes is so mature and grown up for her 17 years. So doesn’t get involved in petty situations in school, she works hard, and focuses on her future and getting through school. She and Drake instantly click. Despite the age gap, there is something there between them that although they try to ignore, it’s blatantly there. They spend all their time together and it’s obvious that feelings are changing between them both for each other even though they are petrified and would rather hide them.

I loved the fear Drake had in losing her (which you will read in The Rocker That Savors Me). It was pure and you see just how much he and Lana balance each other out. But when one situation changes everything, Lana needs to do what is best for her. She is such a strong, caring girl and you really do feel for her. She loves Drake so much, but this something, she just needs to get away. To try and forget what happened. To focus on herself now even though she cares so much for Drake, it’s down to him to make the change.

Being miles away from Drake, I think it made Lana grow up and grow into herself. She just needed that time away to be herself – to focus on school but also focus on what she wants. I was so proud of her for standing up for herself, for not taking crap off Emmie, whom, despite my love for her, seemed to have some sort of vendetta against her. (I’m hoping this works itself out) but as I’ve said, Lana is amazing, shes brilliant and she didn’t deserve the hate towards her because it wasn’t her fault at all. (You’ll see what I mean). But I am glad she got her happy ending and both her and Drake, well I love them together and I’m glad they got over the issues standing in the way.

Drake does get his happily ever after. My heart was clenching in sweetness and an overpowering feeling to cwtched the shit out of him and Lana. My darling Drake finally got there in the end. Got to a point in his life where he was completely and utterly happy, in love so deeply with the one girl who stole his heart from the first sight. His journey wasn’t an easy one in any means. Lots of hurdles and bumps along the way, but they made him stronger. He broke his own barrier down, he stopped drinking, he put his guilt behind him, knowing and learning it wasn’t his fault and he got the girl who he knew he wanted to change for and be a better man for. You really cannot get any better than Drake. No way.

If you have yet to read about my book boyfriends in The Rocker series by the fabulous Terri Anne, then you are completely missing out. Seriously, you are because from the first book I knew this would become a favourite series of mine and it has. You have a band of ‘brothers’ all who have different secrets from their childhood and have grown up together and they have Emmie, the glue to their family. The girl who they all protected when they were younger and still are in a way. You watch the separate band members find their own way in life now; finding the one girl they want to spend their life with, and watching them grow.

The Rocker series isn’t one I’ve read before. The Rocker aren’t party animals, they aren’t the drink and drugs types. They are tame and it’s now time for them all to find the love of their life.

So join me in loving this series so hard and find new book boyfriends in each one of them.

Posted in Guest Reviews, YA

GUEST REVIEW: Storm (The Elemental Series #1) – Brigid Kemmerer

Posted on by Z. Elizabeth

10401084Synopsis

Becca Chandler is suddenly getting all the guys all the ones she doesn’t want. Ever since her ex-boyfriend spread those lies about her. Then she saves Chris Merrick from a beating in the school parking lot. Chris is different. Way different: he can control water just like his brothers can control fire, wind, and earth. They’re powerful. Dangerous. Marked for death.

And now that she knows the truth, so is Becca.

Secrets are hard to keep when your life’s at stake. When Hunter, the mysterious new kid around school, turns up with a talent for being in the wrong place at the right time, Becca thinks she can trust him. But then Hunter goes head-to-head with Chris, and Becca wonders who’s hiding the most dangerous truth of all.

The storm is coming.

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Review by Natasha Bowyer

Storm is the first full length novel in the Brigid Kemmerer’s Elemental series, and boy is it so much more than it says on the front cover. A fact which I truly love.

When The Book Lover’s requested guest book reviews, it was the first book I thought of; why? Because it is just so ridiculously awesome I struggle to put it into words. It was the last book that I had to read three times in a row (without taking a break) and it was the last book I read which I thought about for a long time after.

I picked up the novel thinking it was going to be a quick paranormal romance that I could just whizz through in a couple of sittings, oh how wrong could I be. Firstly it is not paranormal; it is something far more fundamental then that and has a subject matter which leaves you with a small voice in the back of your mind weighing up the odds of whether it could actually happen. I am talking basics – Earth, Wind, Fire and Water i.e. the Elements.  Secondly the quality of writing far outweighs it from other books in the similar YA/NA category. It is fast, it is deep, it is gritty, it touches on subjects that push the boundaries on what is normally considered safe for the genre and target audience, the dialogue is sharp and witty, it uses adult language (good grief teenagers who swear who would have thought of such a thing?!) And it has sarcasm by the bucket load – bet you’d never guess I am huge fan of sarcasm.

More importantly than all the above it is a romance that is so painfully realistic in its portrayal that by the end of the novel you can’t help but sit there and grin like a lunatic as you find out just how it is going to end.

I am not going to deny that the serious smattering of outrageously hot guys did little deter me from the major book crush that developed during my obsessive reading of the novel. The Merrick brothers have well and truly won me over and I live in vain hope that one day I may get stuck in a storm with at least one of them, my preference would be for Chris our leading man in this series instalment.

Told from two points of view this is the tale of Chris and Becca and oh my is it a good one.

Becca Chandler has problems, and they are evident from the first page, the reader does not know that shape or form that they take but finding our main protagonist at a self defense class can only be an opening to a major plot line – which as it turns out ends on the heart rate inducing side of the drama scale.

Becca’s problems only get worse when she interrupts Chris Merrick being beaten up by a couple of menacing youths. Making a split second decision she steps in to help and manages to save Chris from the pummelling and gets him home to his house where we are introduced to the rest of the parentless Merrick brothers, First there is hot but grouchy Michael, then there is hot but short tempered Gabriel, and then hot and kind Nick – do you see where I am going with this?! They all think Becca knows something, which she doesn’t and well neither do we. These boys are paranoid, mistrustful and outright rude and bad mannered which adds the suspense and mystery that Kemmerer starts to build from the very first pages.  The Merrick’s have a secret one that has torn through their family and they don’t want anyone knowing about it.

From the moment we glimpse inside Chris’ head it is acutely clear that Chris has a thing for Becca – or Becky as he likes to call her just to wind her up – and it is in this fact alone that Brigid Kemmerer completely had me over a drooling barrel of chrushness. She completely gets writing from a guy’s perspective, and from being inside Chris’ mind you get to see all the thoughts and feelings which he has but does not show on the surface. What he says and what he does are two completely different things, as the reader in the know you can’t help but enjoy the privileged position that you are in.  At the point in the novel where Chris thinks he has lost in the battle for Becca’s attentions you can’t help but feel the pain of the guy, it  is all there in his thoughts but you watch him acting out with the cool indifference of a teenager and it makes it all the more poignant.

I don’t want to give away too much of the plot, because I truly can’t ask you enough to read it for yourself, you won’t regret, it but let me just give you a little low down without any spoilers.

There is an amazing support cast, not only the (hot) brothers, but Becca’s best friend Quinn plays a role, there is the arrival of the mysterious and aloof boy with the tattoo’s – Hunter who takes an instant liking to Becca much to Chris’ concern, there is Becca’s Dad who pitches up at a strange time and then there are the baddies who are quite frankly menacing.

The story line itself is complex and clever. Becca has a rep and you feel you kind of know why but it is never spelt out for you. Everyone talks about her but she just ignores it and carries on with everything. When you find out exactly what happened to start the rumour mill churning it makes you have to re-read it just to make sure you got it right the first time, especially when it becomes clear that it is going to happen again.

It is a story about family bonds and that even the most dysfunctional family have emotions that tie them together one way or another.

It is a story about regret and remorse and how you live with it.

It is a story about facing your demons and defeating them.

And most importantly it is about accepting someone into your life and setting out to save them no matter what the cost.

Read it. You won’t be sorry you did.

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Natasha has a book out in the Fall under the name ‘Anna Bloom’ which is titled ‘The Uni File – Year One: The Art of Letting Go.’
The synopsis of the book goes as follows:

“Lilah McCannon is determined to prevent history from repeating itself.  Already well on her way to reliving her mother’s life as a bored upper class housewife—privileged, yet still somehow pathetic—Lilah shocks her parents and her fiancé with an abrupt change in course:  enrolment at Roehampton University.  Although it’s not quite the institution she would have hoped for, it is the only one to accept a desperate application from a young woman in the throes of a mid-twenties breakdown.

Lilah’s diary the “Uni File” follows Lilah’s pursuits throughout the academic year and chronicles her search for independence and identity, her connection with young and charismatic roommates, and her attempts to abide by a set of self-imposed rules, each of which is broken in one hilarious fashion after the next.

When Lilah catches the eye of the lead singer of a popular local band, he forces her hand on her “No Boys” rule.  Romance and true soul searching ensue, as do a string of comically embarrassing episodes and poignant encounters with family, friends and fellow students as Lilah studies “The Art of Letting Go.”

You can find Natasha at:-
http://annabloomwrites.com/
Twitter – @Annabloombooks

Posted in Family, Music, New Adult, Romance, Terri Anne Browning

The Rocker That Holds Me – Terri Anne Browning

Posted on by Z. Elizabeth

17285983Synopsis

Touring with four rockers is the thing of dreams…

At least that is what people tell me. To me those four rockers are my family. They have watched over me from the time I was five years old. Protecting me from my mother and her drunken, drug addict rages. When they made it big they still watched over me. And when my monster of a mother died they took over as my guardians.

In the six years since that happened I have watched over the four men that
mean everything to me. I take care of them just as they once took care of me. I handle all the dirty work behind the scenes of a rockers life. It isn’t always pretty. At times it came be damn near disgusting, especially when I have to get rid of their one night stands. Ugh!

Taking care of them doesn’t bother me though. I mean it’s not like I’m in love with one of them. That would be crazy. Falling for a rocker is NOT smart.

Okay, so I’m not smart. I love my guys, and one of them kind of holds my heart in his big old rocker hand. But I’m dealing. I’ve been able to keep it my little secret for years now.
I’m not, however, dealing with this bug that I seem to have caught. It scares the hell out of me. I hate doctors, but I’m suddenly more worried about finding out what is wrong with me than what the doctor might do to me.

When I get my test results back my life will never be the same again…

***Because of language and adult situations not suitable for readers under 17***

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My Review

“Yes, I am in love. There is this Ember in my heart that has hold of me and won’t let go.”

Ember didn’t have the best childhood. Living on a trailer park, her mother was a drunk, a druggy and would beat up Emmie when she was in a rage – which was most of the time. But at 7, Emmie had the four best friends she could have that looked after her when her mother beat her. Albeit, the guys were 10 years older, but they were always there for her, protecting her and cleaning her up.

They knew if the police got involved then their Emmie would be taken away from them and they didn’t want that. They were the ones that needed to keep her safe and protect her, not the social services.

At 15, Emmie’s mum died and since the guys were now in a famous band, they took Emmie in, telling social services that she was theirs and that was that. She has been touring and living with them for the past six years, taking care of them, like they did for her when she was younger and handling their dirty work aka getting rid of their one night stands!

As much as she loves them, there’s one rocker who holds her heart the most, but she knows he doesn’t feel the same as her, so she just needs to deal with it, but when she starts feeling ill and ends up at the hospital, all is not what it seems and when the results are back, she is in for a huge shock.

Although The Rocker That Holds Me is only 99 pages long, there is depth in the story, the characters are developed – albeit you don’t really find out about their home life on the trailer park apart from Emmie’s so I am hoping there are more books – and the little family they create is utterly perfect. I loved reading about how much they mean to each other, after all those terrible years during their childhood. From the beginning, you may think this book is filled with heavy issues but you would be wrong and as the story went on it was lighter although there are angsty bits along the way.

I spotted this book on Amazon last night, and because it contained Rockstars – my favourite – I knew I had to grab a copy and read it straight away. I was not disappointed at all and the story develops despite only being 99 pages long. You feel like you know these characters and they take a bit of your heart along with Emmie’s.

Emmie, as I’ve said, hasn’t had the best childhood. Subjected to abuse, the guys were her saviour; her guardian angels. So when her mum dies and she goes to ‘live’ with them, so knows she owes them everything for what they have done for her all these years. Emmie seems to have become stronger in herself, although she still has nightmares sometimes; she knows that the guys are only a few feet away if she needs them. She can hold her own against them but she still gets scared that they are going to disown her when they find out the news of what is wrong with her. But she should know by now that no matter what is wrong, these guys love her and would never let her go.

I ADORED the band! You first meet them when they are 17(?)(I had to work out their ages, still not sure if it’s right) and are tending to Emmie’s cuts. From the beginning you can see how much Emmie means to them all; they need to protect her. When they become famous, they don’t forget Emmie and they send her money, buy her things and give her a phone so when she needs them, she only has to call, so when her mother dies, they automatically leave to come back home to her – shes more important to them than the band and they will do anything for her. They truly love her and that’s why they took her with them instead of letting the social services take her. Shes part of their family and they have all been through so much together. She is theirs, and they are hers.

I freaking loved Jesse and Nik. More so Jesse because he was always there for Emmie, through the tears, through the ‘illness’ and he would do whatever it took to make her happy and smile again. It was really sweet to see how much her crying affected him and he hated it, it tore him up inside. For such a metal band, they aren’t afraid to show their emotions. He really was a big brother to her.

Now Nik. Holy moly, he sounded so hot! I can see why Emmie fell for him. Much the same as Jesse, he was there for her and you could really see how much he cared for her, a little bit more than ‘sister love’. All the little things he was saying/doing, I couldn’t understand how Emmie wasn’t picking up his feelings, but then I suppose when you’ve loved someone so long, and you think they only think of you as a ‘little sister’ then seeing beyond that wouldn’t cross your mind.

I did feel that all this will-they-wont-they could have easily been sorted out with either of them telling the other how they feel. They kind of kept mucking each other up, especially Nik, trying to make Emmie jealous to see if she really did have feelings for him?! BOY why would you do that to a girl? It isn’t fair at all to do that when it’s obvious she loves you. But when he finally spilled his guts, oh man, I fell even more for you, you sweetheart. Ugh you know just the right things to say and I love you for that.

The epilogue was a great ending to the book. It summed up the love that Nik and Emmie had together, along with a little surprise. I would love to know more about their relationship, so when Jesse’s book is out, I do hope they get some part in it!

I CANNOT wait for Jesse’s book next! I’d love to find out more about this brilliant drummer and his past story too. I’d also like to know more about Drake and Shane, especially Drake, who seemed to like his alcohol a bit too much, which was his way to forget his childhood demons. I want to know about their childhood – as they are brothers – and if they both went through the same things and are using different coping mechanisms to forget the past or if something just happened to Drake? Hmmm. I hope they do get their books; I’d love to know their story!

So if you like Rockstars, romance, sex, friendships and twists and turns, then The Rockstar That Holds Me is definitely the book for you. It’s a short read but it holds so much in the plot. I’d definitely recommend it to all of you, because I absolutely loved it!

Posted in Erotica, Olivia Cunning, Romance

ARC: Hot Ticket (Sinners on Tour #3) – Olivia Cunning

Posted on by Z. Elizabeth

12710035Synopsis

There are things in bassist Jace Seymour’s past that he is unwilling to share with anyone. To cover his guilt and anguish, he seeks dominatrix Mistress V (Aggie) to temporarily placate his inner turmoil.

Aggie doesn’t have much use for men–besides the power rush she gets when they’re begging for mercy at her feet–but Jace isn’t like her usual clients. His cool defiance and unexpected dominance in the bedroom drives her to distraction and quickly steals her heart.

When circumstances threaten Jace’s position in Sinners, Aggie must help him regain his rightful place in the band while showing him that time and love can heal all wounds.

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My Review

There are things in his past that he just doesn’t want to share with anyone and so to take away the guilt, Jace Seymour likes to feel pain by being punished. One night he seeks out Aggie, who is Dominatrix Mistress V to temporarily make him forgot for a while.

Aggie doesn’t really like men; she thinks they are all sleazy. She gets a power rush when they are at her feet, begging her for mercy. But when she spots Jace, he isn’t like any of her usual clients. He doesn’t scream when she hits him, he just stands there and takes it with a hard exterior. Because of this, she knows he’s got a closet full of secrets and pushing away her list of guys, she is slowly falling for the quiet one of the band. She wants to help him through his past and show him that he is loved by everyone including herself and he deserves to be happy after feeling guilty for so long.

Hot Ticket is Jace’s story. The quiet one of the band. The one who doesn’t let anyone in and fears if he did, they wouldn’t want him in the band anymore so he keeps quiet. Before Hot Ticket, I hadn’t really thought much of Jace. He seems to keep to himself so you never really knew much about him in the other two books (I’m disregarding Double Time, which is meant to be book five even though it was released as book three) but in his book you can see how much the band means to him and how much music is such a big part of his life that he wouldn’t know what to do without it. He doesn’t crave attention like the other members, he’s just there to play great music.

Oliva Cunning did a great job in writing Jace’s character. You kind of know from the first two books that Jace likes to be hit – to feel pain but you never really know why until now. In Rock Hard, when they are in the strip club for Brian’s stag night and Sed says he sees Jace go towards the girl with a whip and in leather – that is Aggie. He seeks her out in return to cover up his guilt and anguish over his childhood and his demons that he has locked away all his life.

Jace has things from his past that he would sooner forget and by visiting dominatrix’s, they can stop his turmoil, if only for a few minutes. When he sees Aggie, he knows he must have her inflict pain on him but he never thought that she would worm her way into his heart and try to help him through his past.

Aggie likes her job at the strip club. She likes being a Dom as it gives her power over the clients she has. She likes having them beg for mercy. She doesn’t like men and has two lists. List A: Men not worth my time and List B: Men I’d like to fuck. All of the men have been in List A, but then when she spots Jace, he’s the first man to be put into List B and possibly her new list, List C: Men I can’t instantly label. Aggie could instantly see that Jace was hiding pain behind his calm exterior. He wanted pain, she gave it to him but in turn, her heart was fluttering for him, which never happens to her with clients.

She’s there for Jace and helps him open up about his past. Even with him attempting to push her away in some scenes, she never leaves him as she is completely head over heels for him and she knows he loves her too, even if he can’t show his emotions or feelings because of his past. She shows him so much love and shows him it’s okay to bare his soul and past to her, she’s not going anywhere. It was great that Aggie stood her ground with Jace and slowly, he began to tell her the pain of his past and the scars of his heart. These scenes were quite emotional to read, as I began to really love Jace so by reading about his anguish over his past and reading what happened, they pulled my heartstring and made me want to climb into my kindle and give him a massive hug.

Because of his past, Jace also feels that he’s not good enough. Not good enough for the band, not good enough to be loved; none of this is true. The band absolutely adore him and only tease him because they love him and this proves that he is loved by everyone in his life. As he didn’t really have a childhood, he had to grow up fast and so by all the teasing, he feels that he’s not wanted, but that is not true and Aggie eventually gets through to him that the band love him and that’s why they tease him.

It was fantastic to see how much progress Jace had done with telling Aggie about his past to showing his emotions to her in front of the band. It made me so proud of him to come out of his shell and let go of the guilt he’s felt for so many years. And it’s all thanks for Aggie.

Now for someone who isn’t a fan of BSDM (I just about got through with 50 Shades) it drew me in with the descriptions of what was happening and what both Jace and Aggie were doing to each other. It wasn’t heavy going and it didn’t make me want to skip it. I knew when I read the synopsis I was either going to love or hate this book because of the BDSM but I loved it. The sex was utterly smoking hot!! Olivia definitely knows how to write a sex scene to make you all flustered when reading it and it’s the same in Hot Ticket. Although there was less sex in this book than the others, it definitely doesn’t mean that the scenes were any less inadequate than the other three books because holy moly it wasn’t. Jace and Aggie had such great chemistry and they were so perfect for one another.

From the first two books (and the last) Jace has always looked up to Eric (You’ll know why in this book) – the drummer of the band – and in Hot Ticket, you finally see why that is. Eric calls Jace ‘Little Man’ because he’s the smallest and youngest of the band. Jace feels that Eric saved his life all those years ago and so he’s been Eric’s biggest fan since. They have a strange relationship as Eric can be a bit of an arsehole to Jace but you find out that really, Eric thinks of Jace as his best friend in the band. It was the cutest line ever in this book between the two and although Jace was still understanding how much the band really did love him, it was hard for him to believe but he got there in the end. I cannot wait for Eric’s book and to see how this friendship develops.

I loved Hot Ticket. It possesses hot sex, demons, guilt, love and of course drama. But with The Sinners there is always so drama 😉 it wouldn’t be them without it. I love Olivia Cunning and her books and if you haven’t read any of The Sinner’s books yet, then click on Olivia Cunning in my category dropdown box on the side and get reading my reviews. You will be panting just to get your hands on these books!

When Eric’s book is out, I am definitely planning to re-read all the books in order.

Thanks to Netgalley for supplying me with an ARC copy of Hot Ticket via the publisher in return for an honest return.