Posted in New Adult, Rachel Van Dyken

Ruin (#1) – Rachel Van Dyken


I’m not your typical girl. I’ve been running away from the memories that haunt me for so long that depression has become my only comfort. I was content in the darkness…until Wes Michals offered to be my light.

I didn’t know that time wasn’t my ally — that every second that ticked past was one step closer to the end of something that was beginning to mean the end of myself. He tried to warn me. He promised me all he was able to offer–each moment as it came–but it would never be enough.

Sometimes when you think it’s the end, it’s only the beginning. Wes thought he could save me, but in giving me everything, he ruined me. Because after one kiss, one touch, I couldn’t–I wouldn’t ever be the same.

And from that moment on, his heartbeat became my own.

5 out of 5 stars!!




My Review

I’ve had Ruin on my kindle for months now. When I did my Top 13 Books of 2013, my Twinnie had it down as one book and seeing so many people talk about how amazing this book was that when Fearless and Toxic came out, I knew it was time to get to know Weston and Keirsten like many others have.

Can I just say I LOVE THIS BOOK! It is most definitely a 5 star book from me. The banter between all the characters had me in stitches. The emotional scenes had me crying (I wasnt that far in and I was on a train with tears streaming down my face) and my chest hurting and I was messaging Karli Perrin asking her if something drastic happens – i’m not going to say what because its a part of the storyline, but I was worrying, and frightened and needed to know, but alas she wouldnt tell me.

I cant tell you how much I was on tenterhooks just waiting for the inevitable to happen, for the life-changing (okay, many not life-changing, but for the full on shock and sobbing to occur) scene to happen. For me to break down, find out what the hell has been happening and try to remain calm and hope for the best. And when it did happen, yupp you can guarantee I was sobbing. Such a The Edge of Never moment for me!

Ruin shows the journey of Kiersten and Weston. Both have painful pasts. Kiersten has nightmares about death and losing the ones she loves, Weston is harbouring a pretty massive secret, from virtually everyone apart from his family.

But when they meet, Weston helps Kiersten out, making her overcome her fears and in itself, they are both falling for each other yet Weston is on borrowed time. It’s a story about overcoming fears, battling for yourself and finding love, even in the darkest of times. They both ruin each other.

I adored Kiersten. She was so innocent and sweet and I suppose (stereotyping now) that if you are from a really small town, where everyone knows everyone, it would be hard to do anything when all eyes would be on you. I loved how she trusted so easily, how she was naïve to an extent but also how she was a scared eighteen year old who had yet to experience what most teenagers had. But I suppose what she was harbouring is enough to make someone think negativity about life and about themselves.

I loved the fact that although she didnt really understand, she knew love. She knew that any time she had with Weston she would savour it. She didnt have a clue that something was wrong with him but she treasured the little things. She wrote a list down of things to accomplish and that, in itself, shows how brave she is. Some are trivial, some are huge but each other proved she was overcoming her fears. She had such strength in her and especially when everything went down, of course she faltered but I was so proud of the way she handled it all, handled herself, handled Wes. She is one awesome heroine.

Oh Weston. I LOVE this guy!! He is flirty and funny and has so much banter, but you know he is also harbouring a secret. You kind of unravel bits and pieces about what is wrong throughout the book and your heart starts racing. One part involving Wes is the part I started crying on the train. I had to remotely wipe away my tears before getting off at my stop. He is the most loveliest guy and despite being an RA (not quite sure what that is) and with all the ladies loving him, there is something about Kiersten that he is drawn to – although he doesnt date Freshmen, but he cant stay away.

I really liked his strength in front of Kiersten, despite the fact he didn’t feel strong in himself. He helped her get out of her shell, and in return it felt like he was killing himself with wanting her but knowing his really couldn’t. I admired his bravery, I admired everything about him.
He was a cheeky chappy and with everything happening to him you cant help but command him. You feel sick at points, you cry for him, beg for him but through it all, he’s caring and protective and still thinking about Kiersten, and not really himself. (You will understand when you read Ruin) I loved his love for his redheaded girlfriend, and his inspirational quotes about life and fear. It’s no wonder Kiersten fell for him, I would be head over heels for him.

The two of them together? Sweetest couple ever. The banter they have together, the nickname they have for each other. Cutest nicknames ever and very suiting! The way they are together, they way they protect and care and love for each other is something else. And the way they help each other, consciously and unconsciously makes them both stronger as people.

I loved the ‘supporting’ characters – Gabe and Lisa – who were brilliant. They are cousins and Lisa is Kiersten’s room-mate but they become so close and the banter between the whole group will have you in stitches and laughing through tears. Gabe has his own book – Toxic – which I cannot wait to get started with. I adored him in Ruin, the way he protected and cared for Kiersten and I would love to know more of his background and get his own happy ending.

Havent read Ruin yet? I have no idea why it took me so bloody long! But if you are umming and ahhing on your next read, then PICK THIS BOOK UP 🙂


Smutty author

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